by Jennifer Craig

You’ve probably heard of sexting before. Although parents are having a hard time because their teenagers are doing it, for adults, it’s a completely different matter. Long-distance relationship sexting can be healthy and helpful. So if you want to know everything about it—what you should do and what you shouldn’t do—read this guide carefully and use it to sext your partner the smart way.

What Is Sexting?

Sexting means to send and receive sexual text messages on your mobile phone from another person. This is a form of keeping in touch, of communicating each other’s needs, desires and fantasies, and it’s way of maintaining the flame of any relationship. Although sexting can be done by any couple, for people in long-distance relationships it is a must. Because your man might not be sure if you’d be into it or not, you can take the reins and use sexting to your advantage. Keep in mind that with sexting, less is more!

Sexting is actually the prelude to foreplay, and it is considered sex for your mind. You can use sext messages to tingle each other’s mind with little arousing hints that will make your lover curious and spark desire inside him. Although you might not be a dirty talker in person, through SMS, things can be completely different. Of course, it’s not recommended to go overboard with it right from the start because that would take away from the fun of it, but as the exchange of text messages escalates, you can be as sexually explicit as you and your partner are comfortable.

Why Is It Important to Sext?

Sexting is a door to sex. Through sexting, you can better communicate your sexual desires, and you might even find out sooner what your partner likes and dislikes in bed. Rather than having a serious conversation about sexual matters, sexting makes things fun and broadens your sexual horizon. Many times, it makes people feel sexier and creates an atmosphere of lust, desire and passion. It is important to sext because it will create a different kind of connection between the two of you. And it’s just another way for you two to keep in touch in spite of the distance that separates you.

As a woman in a long-distance relationship, sexting will take help you experience a whole different level of intimacy. Even though you have cybersex on a regular basis, psychology experts believe that phones are far more intimate than computers; therefore, sexting will bring you closer together. Moreover, men find it incredibly arousing when women talk dirty or say things that have hidden connotations. Keep in mind that men are visual creatures. So by either snapping a photo during your sexting session or by simply showing him in writing what you want, it will make him feel wanted, desired and loved.

What To Do

  • Use sexting as prelude. Are you planning on going online tonight to Skype with him? Send him some hinting text messages that will make him anticipate seeing you on camera tonight. (“I got a new lingerie piece for tonight. What color do you think it is?”)
  • Make it about him. Tickle his curiosity, and make him think about something naughty without actually saying anything. (“I dreamt about you last night, but I woke up before the dream was finished … ”
  • Don’t send explicit dirty texts too often. Even though you might feel like he prefers these sort of texts, they won’t be as effective if you use them too often. (“It’s lunch time and I’m hungry. I’d eat anything off of your naked body!”)
  • Be funny and naughty. Making a funny joke is a great way of being naughty while still making it seem like you’re innocent. Take something he said and twist it around. (“Which head did you use to think about that: the upper one or the lower one?”)
  • Let your creativity take over. Do you have a fantasy? Use sexting to let it out one bit at a time (“I’d be dressed in latex completely. Will you be my slave?”)
  • Know your boundaries. Although sexting is done impromptu, it’s good to have a safety net and to talk about things you should and shouldn’t do before they become a problem.
  • Check the number before you hit send. There have been so many instances where people sent texts to the wrong recipients. Don’t put yourself in an awkward position. Double check your recipients before hitting send each and every time!

What Not To Do

  • Sexting cannot solve relationship problems. If you’ve been arguing, it’s probably not a good idea to send him a sext right now.
  • Don’t exaggerate. If you want to be raunchier than usual and you notice that he’s not engaging in it with you, then back off gently.
  • Don’t sext him while he’s at work unless you know that he’s OK with it.
  • Don’t save your texts, his texts or photos. You never know what happens, and one day they might fall into the wrong hands.

15 Examples of Text Messages for Sexting

  • What’s up? I hope someone will be soon…
  • What are you wearing?
  • Want to play a game with me?
  • You, me, Skype, mic, webcam, tonight. You with me?
  • I thought about you earlier, and I felt tingling in the weirdest place. ..
  • I’m starved. You have to feed me tonight!
  • If only you could read my mind right now …
  • How can you turn me on so bad when you’re so far away?
  • I want to be your prey tonight.
  • What do you want me to wear tonight on camera?
  • All day today I felt a strong urge to ride something …
  • I’ll show you mine if you show me yours!
  • I’m feeling lonely. Can you help?
  • What’s your favorite thing to do? Is it me?


Texting (and sexting) is a great way to bring that spark and intimacy back into your long-distance relationship. There are three things you need to do to spice up your relationship:

  1. You need to tease your man.
  2. You need to give him permission to be a guy.
  3. You need to make him feel safe, like he can be romantic without it being a big deal.

Sending the right text messages can take your relationship to a whole new level.

About the author 

Jennifer Craig

Jennifer Craig has been in a successful long-distance relationship and started SurviveLDR to encourage those who want to pursue love with partners in far land.

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  1. Haha this is awesome. I think about all the teens and young adults who do this when they can easily go see each other. I guess it is a good way to stay close but when you are long distance, all you have are your words. I know why people do things like this.

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